Just 3 months ago I left to go to the US.

And in that time I feel I've changed so much.

Aside from the fact that every quarter feels like a leap from the person I was 3 months ago. This quarter has felt like a quantum leap in the feeling of the type of person I am.

A few reasons as to why that's happened specifically come to mind:

1/ I thrive under new stimuli. ‍

I'm a creature of learning. I love collecting ideas and you can only scavenge some many new thoughts in the same plot of land. Everyday I feel like a sponge ready to absorb something new with the A-player team I work with, reflect on how I could improve, or have an interesting conversation that frames life a little differently.

I think the sooner you cultivate the people who can increase your exposure to new ideas, the sooner it will exponentially increase your learning and maturity.  

2/ In the US people tend to be more open.

‍I have met so many weird and wacky and wonderful people in the US. From Uber drivers pitching their Soundcloud in cars that smell a bit too herbal to being invited over for dinner with my old 60 y/o neighbours Kim & Jim who shared so much of their love of the history and city of San Francisco – everyone in the US has such a strong sense of self and willingness to put it on display.

While you can call it the by-product of a hyper-independent and hyper-capitalist society, as someone who grew up requiring to be asked and prodded on specific questions to open up, it's challenged my default behaviour to say more of what's on my mind without pause or fear if it was wrong or right.

It goes back to the idea of more stimulus. The more people I've seen be themselves regardless of race, education, career, income, beliefs and be quite proud of themselves – makes me think to myself, "hey, I've also got interesting things to share too".

3/ I've spent more time actively choosing to be by myself. ‍

These past few weeks I've been actively trying to spend more time by myself. Previously a lot of that time would have been dedicated to seeing a partner, dawdling on housechores by chatting with my roommate or drowning in external client and Next Chapter work.

But the absence of those things have made me face myself in the mirror more. Without those excuses or pre-planned commitments – who am I? What do I like doing? Obsessing over? Wasting time on? Aside from travel, work, gym, what the hell is my personality trait? It's been a fun exercise of literally just trying to be a normal human being with hobbies and side projects.

And it's made me more cognisant of this paradox whereby being in such an interesting city with interesting people, I feel a need to almost "keep up" in terms of interestingness. At the same time, going out and socialising with people ironically doesn't make you more "interesting".

So I've largely started keeping to myself to indulge in interests and creative pursuits. And I love it. Screw hanging out with people.

I've realised my mind has so much room for play and curiosity when I give it space to breathe without the need to perform.

4/ Momentum fuels self-belief which further fuels momentum.

‍In 2022 I felt my internal scoreboard got shattered. I wanted to post to LinkedIn but fear overcame me. I had sky-high ambitions but felt my support system and lack of self-confidence pulling me down. I wanted to work on creative projects but couldn't say no to money-making opportunties. I was scattered, with too many things I wanted to do at once and without any of the momentum to get started.

The more I didn't do something, the more I felt like I couldn't do it.

I felt completely out of alignment.

Since going to the US, it's felt like a clean slate.

Part of writing these weekly reflections felt like a small commitment to myself to be consistent. It hasn't been perfect, but seeing a track record of consistent things I've done keeps me going! As does trying and succeeding to have a consistent gym routine in different countries. The more ill-circumstances you can push through to do something, the more possible it feels to push through in any circumstance.

The start of doing anything is hard. It's like rolling a ball up a hill. Sweating, pushing and heaving at the hope you'll reach a summit where the topography starts to shift and downward momentum tumbles you faster than your tired legs ever could.

Something I've realised though, is that you can always roll the ball up. It's a choice. And while that might mean ending up like the legend of Sisyphus, the most rewarding thing for the internal scorecard is knowing damn right that you kept trying.

5/ I have built a beautiful support system. ‍

Finally, I have felt so lucky over the past few years to have cultivated the friend and people in my life right now. Despite being overseas, I never felt at all removed from my inner circle back at home, and it's something I want to continue to nurture and cherish.

I am so appreciative of the friends that pick up my calls, share their fears and wins in life, share their 2c because they care for me.

I had lots of fears going overseas that many of these friendships may wither or the lack of a date marked on when we would see each other next would hinder the friendship. In all honesty, it's instead made me more more independent and comfortable with myself, and more intentional about regularly keeping in touch with these soul friends.

I imagine my life and career to be fairly international and potential moreso than now, so this will be an interesting thing to monitor. But for the most part, I don't know how I could be any more lucky to have the people I do by my side regardless of geographical bounds. It truly makes the journey all the more enjoyable.

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Directionally, all of this has made me happier, more open, more creative, more direct, more social, and more comfortable with myself in my own skin and I want to keep owning these changes. This quarter has only felt like the feeling of change.

Here's to an epic next 3 months to cementing these changes, and growing, and evolving – as change is life's only constant!